We’re only in our third week of tenpin bowling in the regular league season at Hood River’s Orchard Lanes.
That would be enough of an excuse for most of us who are still struggling.
Yet, it appears some of our crafty competitors have already found the range. How did they do it? Maybe its self-explanatory, so let’s do our first team of the week for the 2019-20 season.
Yet, it appears some of our crafty competitors have already found the range. How did they do it? Maybe its self-explanatory, so let’s do our first team of the week for the 2019-20 season.
It’s always quite a feather in your cap to make the team of the week since it’s modeled after a mythical five-person team in honor of the “old days,” when most of the top leagues were comprised that way. So here goes:
Team of the Week
1. Bill Whetstine, 777 series
2. Mike Parke, 711 series
3. Chad Mason, 694 series
4. Levi Phelps, 689 series
5. Joey Springs, 684 series
1. Bill Whetstine, 777 series
2. Mike Parke, 711 series
3. Chad Mason, 694 series
4. Levi Phelps, 689 series
5. Joey Springs, 684 series
(3,555 total pins)
Now, for “newbies,” here are a few ground rules: The team of the week scores are all scratch, three game series. When we bowl league, we bowl three games, that is called a series. There are no handicaps here. These are pure scores rolled by some mighty fine bowlers. You would be smart to emulate any of them.
Bill Whetstine hit the jackpot in the big-shot Fraternal league, where he pummeled the pins to the tune of a lofty wild sevens 777 set that was capped by a 278 game. Bill, who used to terrorize the lanes in Missouri, is one fine bowler. He joined us late last season, but still had time to notch an award-winning perfect 300 game and an 815 series, which was the highest set bowled at Orchard Lanes last season. Pretty heady stuff!
The “doomsday striking machine,” otherwise known as lefty Mike Parke from The Dalles, did it again by notching a nice 711 series in the senior Colts and Fillies. Mike has rolled so many big numbers he is “automatic,” hence his nickname. Believe it folks, if you bowl Mike, better bring your “A” game.
Chad Mason starred on the award-winning Hood River Valley High School bowling team a few years ago and he’s still stirring the sticks like a pro. In the Fraternal, Chad’s speedy sphere pulverized piles of those helpless 3 pound, 6 ounce pins on his way to a classy 694 series. Chad generates such incredible speed and power on his ball that the pins take a heck of a beating.
Young Levi Phelps is another graduate of juniors at Orchard Lanes. He’s a dandy bowler who has reached the pinnacle of prowess on the lanes. And he does it so smoothly, the exact opposite of most modern bowlers who fire the ball like Aroldis Chapman does for the Yankees. Levi’s easy finesse slants in the Fraternal scattered the sticks all over the place for a nifty 689 set.
Joey Springs returned to league action last season and we’re glad he’s back. Joey is a heck of a bowler who regularly rolls big numbers with ease — he’s always right there in the thick of things. This time, he powered a solid 684 series in the Industrial to anchor our elite five!
Great bowling team! Now, everybody else, let’s get with it and start rolling strikes. Can you make the team of the week?
League reports
Monday night Industrial
Joey Springs, 248 game & 684 series; Jeff Miller, 279 game & 674 series; Steve Byers, 246 game; Joey Sheirbon, 235 game
Monday night Industrial
Joey Springs, 248 game & 684 series; Jeff Miller, 279 game & 674 series; Steve Byers, 246 game; Joey Sheirbon, 235 game
Tuesday night Mixed
Bill Morrissey, 242 game; Jeremy Bloom, 237 game
Wednesday afternoon senior Colts & Fillies
Mike Parke, 257, 232, 222 games & 711 series; Mick Sherrell, 259, 213, 204 games & 676 series; Bernie Keys, 232 game; Lee Rogers, 224, 211 games; Dave Baumsteiger, 210 game
Mike Parke, 257, 232, 222 games & 711 series; Mick Sherrell, 259, 213, 204 games & 676 series; Bernie Keys, 232 game; Lee Rogers, 224, 211 games; Dave Baumsteiger, 210 game
Wednesday night Fraternal
Bill Whetstine, 278, 253, 246 games & 777 series; Chad Mason, 266, 245 games & 694 series; Levi Phelps, 263, 257 games & 689 series; Brandon Kawachi, 245 game & 681 series; Mark Chabotte, 279 game & 676 series; Stan Pratnicki, 269 game & 670 series; Josh Worth, 237 game; Ciena Brittle, 214 game
Thursday afternoon senior Lads & Lassies
George Buck, 207 game; Len Allen, 201 game
George Buck, 207 game; Len Allen, 201 game

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